diff options
Diffstat (limited to 'rbotconf/lart')
| -rw-r--r-- | rbotconf/lart/larts | 98 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | rbotconf/lart/praises | 2 |
2 files changed, 0 insertions, 100 deletions
diff --git a/rbotconf/lart/larts b/rbotconf/lart/larts deleted file mode 100644 index c3a25880..00000000 --- a/rbotconf/lart/larts +++ /dev/null @@ -1,98 +0,0 @@ -swaps <who>'s shampoo with nair -installs windows on <who>'s machine -forces <who> to use perl for 3 weeks -registers <who>'s name with 50 known spammers -resizes <who>'s terminal to 40x24 -takes <who>'s tea -dispenses <who>'s email address to a few hundred 'bulk mailing services' -pokes <who> in the eye -beats <who> senseless with a 50lb Unix manual -cats /dev/urandom into <who>'s ear -signs <who> up for AOL -enrolls <who> in Visual Basic 101 -sporks <who> -drops a truckload of VAXen on <who> -judo chops <who> -resizes <who>'s terminal to 40x24 -formats <who>'s harddrive to fat12 -rm -rf's <who> -stabs <who> -steals <who>'s mojo -strangles <who> with a doohicky mouse cord -whacks <who> with the cluebat -sells <who> on E-Bay -uses <who> as a biological warfare study -uses the "Customer Appreciation Bat" on <who> -reads <who> some vogon poetry -puts <who> in the Total Perspective Vortex -casts <who> into the fires of Mt. Doom -gives <who> a melvin -turns over <who> to Agent Smith to be "bugged" -takes away <who>'s internet connection -pushes <who> past the Shoe Event Horizon -counts "1, 2, 5... er... 3!" and hurls the Holy Handgrenade Of Antioch at <who> -puts <who> in a nest of camel spiders -makes <who> read slashdot at -1 -puts "alias vim=emacs" in <who>'s /etc/profile -uninstalls ld from <who>'s system -locks <who> in the Chateau d'If -signs <who> up for getting hit on the head lessons -makes <who> try to set up a Lexmark printer -fills <who>'s Visene eyedrop bottle with lime juice -casts <who> into the fires of Mt. Doom. -gives <who> a Chicago Steamer -rips off <who>'s arm, and uses it to beat them to death -pierces <who>'s nose with a rusty paper hole puncher -pokes <who> with a rusty nail -puts sugar between <who>'s bedsheets -pours sand into <who>'s oatmeal -mixes epoxy into <who>'s toothpaste -puts Icy-Hot in <who>'s lip balm -straps <who> to a chair, and plays a endless low bitrate MP3 loop of "the world's most annoying sound" from "Dumb and Dumber" -tells Dr. Dre that <who> was talking smack -forces <who> to use a Commodore 64 for all their word processing -smacks <who> in the face with a burlap sack full of broken glass -puts <who> in a room with several heavily armed manic depressives -makes <who> watch reruns of "Blue's Clues" -puts lye in <who>'s coffee -tattoos the Windows symbol on <who>'s ass -lets Borg have his way with <who> -signs <who> up for line dancing classes at the local senior center -wakes <who> out of a sound sleep with some brand new nipple piercings -gives <who> a 2 guage Prince Albert -forces <who> to eat all their veggies -covers <who>'s toilet paper with lemon-pepper -fills <who>'s ketchup bottle with Dave's Insanity sauce -forces <who> to stare at an incredibly frustrating and seemingly neverending IRC political debate -knocks two of <who>'s teeth out with a 2x4 -removes debian from <who>'s system -uses <who>'s debian cds for skeet shooting practice -gives <who>'s phone number to Borg -posts <who>'s IP and root password on alt.2600 -forces <who> to use words like "irregardless" and "administrate" (thereby sounding like a real dumbass)" -tickles <who> until they wet their pants and pass out -replaces <who>'s KY with elmer's clear wood glue -replaces <who>'s TUMS with alka-seltzer tablets -squeezes habanero pepper juice into <who>'s tub of vaseline for <who> -submits <who>'s photo to the people at SA for photoshopping -Forces <who> to learn the Win32 API -gives <who> an atomic wedgie -ties <who> to a chair and forces them to listen to 'N Sync at full blast -forces <who> to use emacs for text editing -frowns at <who> really really hard -jabs a hot car lighter into <who>'s eye sockets -forces <who> to browse the web with IE -takes <who> out at the knees with a broken pool cue -forces <who> to listen to only emo music -signs <who> up for the Iowa State Ferret Legging Championship -attempts to hotswap <who>'s RAM -donkey punches <who> -puts track spikes into <who>'s side -replaces <who>'s Astroglide with JB Weld -replaces <who>'s hypertension pills with rat poison pellets -replaces <who>s jock itch cream with Nair -does the Australian Death Grip on <who> -dances upon the grave of <who>'s ancestors. -farts in <who>'s general direction -flogs <who> with stinging neddle -hands <who> a poison ivy joint diff --git a/rbotconf/lart/praises b/rbotconf/lart/praises deleted file mode 100644 index ac923dd1..00000000 --- a/rbotconf/lart/praises +++ /dev/null @@ -1,2 +0,0 @@ -hugs <who> -gives <who> some love |